You're so vein, you probably think this Blog is about you.

I just spent a good twenty minutes looking into the side mirror of my co-workers car.

Sweet Jesus, look at the size of my forearm. It is freaking huge. Look at that reflection, right next to the bug smear. That’s a forearm of justice, that what that is. Um, let me flex it a little bit, see that little ball of muscle dance for me. Dance baby, dance a little dirty. Hey baby, yea you behind me in the drive through, are you checking out that forearm that I am laying out the window.

You want a little piece of this? Maybe you want to touch it? Be careful not to chip a nail on the steel python that is my forearm. I see you back there, licking your lips. Yeah, put on that lip gloss and imagine this vice grip all over your tender side.

What, you have a friend in the car. Hello little hottie, I’m Hossman. Ya know, I have two of these things, that’s right, a double dose of muscle filled loving. And did you notice how there is the appropriate amount of hair on each arm, not all crazy gurilla? You like that don’t you, naughty minx. Maybe you and your lip gloss friend over there want to come on over and talk to it a little bit. I’ve got forearm loving for each of you.

And guess what, that forearm is attached to a bicep that can lift a sofa. That’s right, it’s muscle mania over in my car. Here, let me roll up my short sleave shirt a little bit so you can see the rest of it. Be careful not to gasp to loud, let’s not alert the neighbors. Um, see that tattoo, that’s pretty cool huh. Yup, that didn’t hurt at all. The screaming I did was only from the joy of manhood.

That’s right, it’s a gargoyle that adorns the shoulder of slender. It means I’m a protector, yeah baby, a protector your righteous virtue. Unless of course you don’t want your virtue to be protected. Haha, hey baby, I’m funny to. Muscles and humor, ready to get out of the car yet?

And what’s this? A back filled with strength and fortitude? Am I for real? Maybe I am and maybe I’m not. Maybe you are just daydreaming in your car and I’m your daydream. Hmmm, yeah. Maybe you are dreaming about you and friend doing a little combo action on the Hossman. Maybe you want to dominate a little, but can you handle the muscles?

No baby, let’s not think about the lack of hair. And no, no baby, let’s not stop on the tour of Hossman at the gut. That ride is still under construction.

But there’s more here for you viewing pleasure, besides the meaty forearms. Let’s check out these legs. I know that I am wearing pants and I’m sitting in the car, but I know you are thinking about them. Their like pylons, are they not? Are they ready to hold up the bridge to your lust? You want to find out? If yes, why don’t you just toss your panties over this way.
And that, my friends, might have been the most vein moment of my entire existence.

1 comment:

  1. you need to post another blog...not that this one is bad it's just when i log on to check for updates i keep getting that song stuck in my head....