The Friday Five

5 Things That I Did This Week While You Were At Work.

5. You're worried about that deadline aren't you? And if it's not the deadline that's got you all stressed out then it's that bitch Becky in accounting. Believe it, she's out to get you. Meanwhile, we had imagination time for an hour. the kids imagined that they were having a tea party and I'm pretty sure that look the hottie gave me at the grocery store was my imagination.

4. Played patty-cake, patty-cake, let's get a beer man. Then we converted the living room into a working replica of Vegas. It's a family town you know, so this was ok. I spent 3 hours teaching my son the odds on craps and my daughter how to say "hit me". But the most important lesson of all? Tip the waitress so she doesn't water down your drinks and comes by more often. These are the lessons that will stay with them forever. On the downside, Bubba Hoss now owns the house. Turns out he's one hell of a poker player. He's now asking for the rent money.

3. the children and I had a wonderful debate about the ins and outs of the rescission and what possible implications the stimulus plan may have on the world at large. We followed that up with a lively discussion on universal health care, is it good for the country. But mostly what we did was watch the dog try and poop for a good 30 minutes with no success. I guess it's time to feed him some prunes. Maybe if he would stay out of the trashcan he wouldn't have this problem.

2. We discovered the answer to The Ultimate Question of Life and Everything. It's 42.

1. We made a Single Ladies dance video and posted it on Youtube. Unfortunately it was flagged as obscene and removed because of repeated wardrobe malfunctions. If anyone knows where they make a hefty gentleman's leotard, we would much appreciate it.


  1. That part about the dog was hilarious! As always, thanks for the laugh!

  2. Explain universal healthcare to your dog and that will make him poop.

  3. You are too funny! Enjoyed the smiles.