9/1/09

Sick

'I cannot go to school today, '
Said little Peggy Ann McKay.
'I have the measles and the mumps,
A gash, a rash and purple bumps.
My mouth s wet, my throat is dry,
I'm going blind in my right eye.
My tonsils are as big as rocks,
I've counted sixteen chicken pox
And there's one more-that's seventeen,
And don't you think my face looks green?
My leg is cut-my eyes are blue-
It might be instamatic flu.
I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,
I'm sure that my left leg is broke-
My hip hurts when I move my chin,
My belly button's caving in,
My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained,
My 'pendix pains each time it rains.
My nose is cold, my toes are numb.
I have a sliver in my thumb.
My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,
I hardly whisper when I speak.
My tongue is filling up my mouth,
I think my hair is falling out.
My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,
My temperature is one-o-eight.
My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,
There is a hole inside my ear.
I have a hangnail, and my heart is-what?
What's that? What's that you say?
You say today is...Saturday?
G'bye, I'm going out to play!

That's right kids, Hossman is out sick - we all hope he feels better soon, because Hossmom isn't as funny and is, frankly, the JV Parent on this team.

(For Niki)

2 comments:

  1. JV Parent my ass! You give your wife your password once and it comes back to haunt you. All of you take notice: A good marriage is built on secrets and a lack of communication.

    I was either abducted by aliens and some serious probing went on

    or

    I ate some bad food and I have a problem writing between screams of "Dear God Let Me Die!"

    Thanks to Hossmom for getting a post up as we all know where I would be without her: living single and playing as many video games as I wanted. In only my socks and underwear. Eating a cold pizza. Wondering where this lump came from on the side of my neck. Ah, the dream.

    ReplyDelete