Little Hoss Interview

I realize that I haven’t written much this week. I know that some of you may be a little upset with me. But it’s been a slow creative week. I’m as disaapointed as you all are. And it shows in my numbers, as I am not doing so great this week. For that, I blame all of you. How can I be the ruler of the world without the people’s support?

So today instead of writing my normal blog, I have decided to let my 20 month old daughter write it. I’m going to do a short interview with her and let her type her answers so you all get a chance to really get to know the greatness of Little Hoss. Enjoy.

Interviewer.
Little Hoss, you have been Hossdads minion for almost 2 years now. You have brought destruction and his wrath to all that would not bend to his will. What is the best part of this job?

Little Hoss:
Asdo;fijhuawet;ouhasdg;kljhasdfg;kjashdg;kjbhbxczvzxcv. Zsdv asd; asdf u a d;’ jhauweqoui weq089 2890 7wasdfasdfjksdfajh sdfa health benefits ew0u89q340u93q4ohia;’hasdjksda

Interviewer:
I see, great answer. Is there anyone in your family that you think deserves a little bit more of your vengeance than another?

Little Hoss:
0p;\/ua34u uat9ol.u4t0p;’uiolp;\joap;\jiagp;/jiawtp;’/jhiasgpjhja;lfjasdiotetghagavn/ZXvn Uncle Bricksalesman a;l h a;owiertoawhi ;oahv;abnv;bnzxcvbnvn;aznv poop head

Interviewer:
Good point, he is a traitorous bastard. Let’s get to your personal life, let’s get to know the real you. You like to eat a lot of stuff off the floor. Any favorites?

Little Hoss:
A;ohhhg aw;oef aw foeroasn/xzcvn/zx cvoisadfowetuowertu aljasdf sd d dog food ao;jfowei ruoweru o jfldajflkasdffas, cat fooda dlskfjoiuaogiuavbja;ljeroiwejoriejrdazxklcnvlkn asj;dfljasldjf random vomit at times.

Interviewer:
Hmmm, that’s really interesting. How about things to throw in the toilet when Daddy isn’t looking. Is there anything that makes a better splash than others?

Little Hoss:
Shoe. Phone.

Interviewer:
Ha ha, you are very funny to. Ok, now that we know you a little better, how about your philosophy of life. Do you poop often and easy or seldom and hard?

Little Hoss:
Sdaf,xcz,.m l/mkzxc,mzxc xczv xcv xcv asdilwqeoiawljk;fsdal xczl;asdjhsadnasd sadasdfhsa Butros Butros Gali asdlvoizx c;lcvjh ;lzvsad;oias sd some of column A, some of column B as;ldkfjoi uzxcvov ;lafg nsda vnv oi zxuvl jawe f in the tub.

Interviewer:
I think we have all been there. Now that you are expecting a little brother, do you have any opinions on how life will change around the house and your role in it?

Little Hoss:
A; lz,/xnvzx nv;aoiust ;alsjdfiuzx; as;ldjjawoeiurtoweiq we09485032489uq[wei lakjf;lsal;fj my own minion a;iweup 8 weuqru;lasfj;lkasdjl;fjas s wedgies.

Interviewer:
I agree, he should be a nice new addition to the Hossman Family and our efforts to convert everyone to our worship. What about your relationship with the dogs. Do you think that this will be affected by the new arrival?

Little Hoss:
Oaieu[0808909u[wq ewq afasfas807-0u’qwerjt’ljk sa u[09uisdfj asdujg[auisg jesus powq4 ut0qu w[otulkjaga fasd as askldfjsdoiu0[u they eat poop [0qawio 4ut08 wualasdfs d;jf

Interviewer:
Maybe, but we’ll have to see. Ok, I think we have gone pretty far here in getting to know the real you and your views. We can all tell that your are obviously genius level. Any last words of advice to our readership that aren’t as great as you?

Little Hoss:
Why yes Father. It would appear that the world gets a little to caught up in it’s own importance. This has the effect of people ignoring me and your blog, which is basically about me. I would suggest that people start telling other people about this before we are forced to offer some chainsaw justice on Xbox live. Also, they should really just relax, life is way more fun that way. Poop.

Interviewer:
I couldn’t agree more my sweet little angel.