9/30/08

Join the Cult, save a life

Take a look to the left of this post. You should see a link called "The Hossman Cult." Go ahead and click on it if you want to join me in greatness. Take the Blue Pill, Neo, take the blue pill.

Basically, as I understand it, it is a way for you become a follower of this blog and it is part of my worldwide plan to become a Tax Exempt entitiy. If Rush Limbaugh can have a bunch of nut job crazies following his every bowel movement, why can't I? As I write this, there is only one follower and that follower is me. That is part of the philosphy of this cult, I follow my own lead.

It's just one of the new features that I have added to the new look of the blog. If you look below the Cult link you will also see a way to suscribe to the blog. Sign up for that and you will be notified when a new blog is posted instead of checking this site out 1000 times a day and then having crushing anxiety attacks when nothing is posted. That's another part of the Cult philosphy--help out the little guy but don't drink the juice. We don't drink tainted juice here, our juice is 100% poison free. Maybe not baby vomit free but that won't kill you, just give you the runs a little bit.

I wish I could take most of the credit for the new look of the blog but sadly, I can't. I can't because I have the fashion sense of a blind monkey with the color cordination of roadkill. I often tell people I am color blind when they asked me why I dressed the way I did. I'm not. I can very much tell the difference between green and red. What you see is just very poor choices in clothing that I tend to make when not under the supervision of my wife.

I once bought a pair of plastic shoes. And not cool crocs. No, this was back in 1993 and they were plastic and purple. I thought they were cool and went great with my Brad Pitt hair. Sadly, they were not and now I've lost my hair as a direct result of my poor fashion sense. So I leave all the "look" of things to Hossmom when ever possible. So she sat down and took my constructive critiscm (That sucks!) and redid the look of my blog for me. Most of it was finished when she told me to get away or she would resort to violence. That didn't work so then she threatened to reveal my most inner secrets. I said hey, I blog, I have no more secrets. I once took a crap on a neighbors fence because I couldn't hold it until I got home. It wasn't a prank, I just couldn't make it. I was 24. What secrets do I have left?

So finally she started to pull out chest hairs, my one weakness, until I left her alone and there you go--the new look of the blog. I got a makeover, rock on.

Some of it is still under construction, such as links to other blogs, but should get there pretty soon because I know that you guys that are working need something to do 7 hours a day besides working. Hey, I used to sit at my computer and read all day, do an hour or real work, then go back to reading other blogs. Don't be shocked, you do that shit too, we all know it.

When the Cult is up and running, all members will recieve white robes and we will begin to vote on politics making us an official "Voting Block" that needs to be catered to. What will we vote for? Paying stay at home dads. That's our one issue so jump on board. If you don't, then my kids will grow up to be motorcycle houligans and ride thier bikes in convience stores and not pay taxes. Do you really want the responsiblity of that? What a bad bad person you all. Ok, I gotta go now because Little Hoss is hurling cat food across the room and making the dogs chase it. Not that I mind it that much, but she's also eating it and I should really stop that. It's the first step to houligany.

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