Eat, Pray, Man Weekend.

I don't want spiritual awareness or inner place that comes from self-realization.  I want to go to man-weekend and sit, blissfully unaware of any and all turmoil that may be rocking through my inner being.  Do I have a 3rd eye?  I have no idea and I don't want to find out.

My wife gave me the book Eat, Pray, Love to read.  The first thing that I noticed is that there are no Russians to fight and the lack of explosions is very concerning.  There's not even a dog and every good story has to have a dog.  What there is a lot of self-reflection, personal growth, and eating.  I was rooting on the eating parts until the author described eating things with no meat.  I've heard that is a thing but I can't imagine overcoming personal demons while not growing a sizeable meat baby in my stomach.

I do like the book and I know why my wife gave it to me.  The writing is excellent, the use of past and present tenses is crafty and there is a ton to learn from that writing style.  Hell, I'm supposed to be working on my own book, right?  So sure, I jumped right into Eat, Pray, Love with the best of intentions.

Now that I'm at man-weekend, an annual get together of old college friends, I'm reading a book that is about a personal journey and overcoming devastating loss.  Yup, this was a great idea to read at man weekend, surrounded by a whole lot of chest hair and a whole lot of not showering.

My wife loves the book, as do millions of people.  Who hasn't felt trapped by circumstances and bad decisions?  But for the guy readers, trying to do very manly things while reading a book like this, it should include someone punching Drago in the face.  If you don't know who Drago is then you should probably go rewatch Rocky IV again and then we can talk about giving your 'Murica card back.

She handed the book over to me a few days before I left.  The receipt was still inside the book.  the book is 10 years old.  My wife will claim that it's just a book mark but after 10 years, I think it is something more.  I think it is a shrine to when my wife first read the book.  When I grabbed a pen and told her I was going to underline some passages and make notes, she visibly jumped.  She brushed it off, "It's just a book," she said.  The cold sweat on her palms though made me think that perhaps it's more than that.   I've spent the last three days making sure I haven't lost that receipt for fear of ruining whatever aura is around this book for her.

And there are auras, according to the book.  And there are Swamis, and journeys, and a connection to your inner god.  There is no BBQ though which is a damn shame.  There should be BBQ.  A dog, BBQ and a bald eagle somewhere.  Because this is man weekend and my unexpected core examination is kind of shitting on that.  There is also some sort of metaphysical blue lightening thing going on and that part I'm not to sure about.  It's supposed to start at your tail bone, travel up through your spine, and then explode on your forehead bringing an understanding of yourself and the universe.

The lady who wrote it, Elizebeth Gilbert, is pretty much a train wreck but isn't that what makes it interesting?  Isn't that the conflict that needs to be resolved.  And aren't we all train wrecks, where emotional truth is as unavoidable as making eye contact with the one person you don't want to?

So here we are, with Hossman doing some inner reflection when I should be trying to bluff my way into a sizable poker pot with a pair of pocket deuces.  I can't though because the book grabs you in a weird way and you keep reading, reading, reading.  

This book spoke to my wife and I'm trying to figure out why.  Is she unhappy with our marriage, I should probably check on that.  And while I'm at it I need to do a spiritual checkup on here inner being if I could understand what any of that was.  Look, I know that I'm as about as deep as a puddle on the highway, but this is some heavy shit here.

And now it dawns on me that is the point of the book.  The point is to not only follow a character who is struggling but to also realize the struggle in yourself and fuck.....I'm looking for my inner peace now.  God damn it.

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